Jokes for Kids : Humor is very subjective; this is very true to everyone who tries to crack a joke. The interesting thing is that there is an awkward feeling that hits us mercilessly whenever we flop. We know it instantly when we land, hit, kill the funny bone.
Jokes for Kids
What is a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore!
What kind of pizza do dogs eat? Pup-eroni pizza!
How do you help a baby astronaut fall asleep? You rock-et!
If cars run on gas, what do cats run on? Their paws!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas!
What kind of pictures do turtles take? Shell-fies!
What do you call a famous turtle? A shell-ebrity!
What do you feed an alligator? Anything it wants!
What makes a sick lemon feel better? Lemon-aid!
How does Spiderman do research? On the World Wide Web!
Did you hear about the clock? It got shushed in the library for tocking too loud.
What do you call a knight who hates fighting? Sir Render.
When is the door, not a door? When it’s ajar.
What does the ocean do when it sees friends? It waves.
How does the moon cut its hair? Eclipse it.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxis.
What kind of tree can fit in your hand? A palm tree.
Did you know that fish live in saltwater because pepper makes them sneeze?
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
What do you call Dracula with hay fever? The pollen Count.
What gets wetter the more it dries?
A towel.
What do you call two bananas?
Slippers.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn’t peeling well.
Why was the mushroom the life of the party?
It was a fungi.
What stays in the corner yet can travel all over the world?
A stamp.
How do you fix a cracked pumpkin?
With a pumpkin patch.
What kind of award did the dentist receive?
A little plaque.
What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
What should you drink while singing nursery rhymes?
Hot Cocomelon.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use a honeycomb.
Why did the cookie go to the nurse? Because he felt crummy!
Which hand is better to write with? Neither. It’s better to write with a pencil!
Why did the science teacher tell her students not to trust an atom? Because they make up everything!
Why can’t the music teacher start his car? He left his keys on his piano!
Why can’t a person’s nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot!
Why did the computer sneeze? Because it had a virus!
What is the witch’s favorite school subject? Spelling!
How does a scientist freshen her breath? With experiments! (experi-mints!)
What is a computer programmer’s favorite snack? Computer chips!
Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? Because he wanted to see time fly!
What is the name of the horse next door? Neigh-bor.
I always wanted to be a doctor, but I didn’t have the patients.
I’m on a seafood diet: When I see food, I eat it.
If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving isn’t for you.
I was going to tell a pizza joke, but it was too cheesy.
I just flew into town and my arms are so tired.
I tried to do my homework but my pencil broke, so it was pointless.
I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey, but I turned myself around.
The more this towel dries, the wetter it gets.
I ate a clock yesterday, it was very time-consuming.
I’ve just written a song about tortillas; actually, it’s more of a w-rap.
Why did the turkey join a band? So she could use her drumsticks.
What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing? An elephant’s shadow.
What’s a frog’s favorite game? Leapfrog.
Who wears shoes while sleeping? A horse.
Why couldn’t the duck stop laughing? He was quacking up.
Why couldn’t the pony sing a song? She was a little horse.
Why did the crab never share? Because he’s shellfish.
Where do cows go for fun? The moo-vies.
Why do dogs like cell phones? They have collar ID.
What do frogs order at fast-food restaurants?
French flies!
What do you get from a pampered cow?
Spoiled milk!
What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries?
An investigator!
Why is a snake difficult to fool?
You can’t pull its leg!
What kind of socks do grizzlies wear?
None, they have bear feet!
What do you get when you cross a snail with a porcupine?
A slowpoke!
What did the dog say when it sat on sandpaper?
“Ruff!”
What’s a cat’s favorite dessert?
Chocolate mouse!
What fish only swims at night?
Starfish!
What does a triceratops sit on?
Its tricera-bottom!
Why did the policeman go to the baseball game?
He’d heard that someone had stolen a base!
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.
What kind of shoes do all spies wear?
Sneak-ers.
What do you call two guys hanging on a curtain?
Kurt and Rod!
Why was the math book sad?
Because it had so many problems.
What’s a snake’s favorite subject?
Hisstory.
Why did the student eat his homework?
Because his teacher told him it was a piece of cake!
What time would it be if Godzilla came to school?
Time to run!
Why did the dog do so well in school?
Because he was the teacher’s pet!
Why did the egg get thrown out of class?
Because he kept telling yolks!
What do you call two robbers? A pair of knickers.
Why don’t seagulls fly over bays? Because otherwise they would be called bagels.
Why did the children eat their homework? Because their teacher told them it was a piece of cake!
Why do mushrooms like to party so much? Because they’re a FUNGI.
Whats a crocodiles favourite game? SNAP
How do you make a sausage roll? Push it down a hill.
Have I ever told you about my bin joke? Nah, it’s rubbish.
Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it’s too far to walk.
Knock Knock. Who’s there? Imap. Imap who?
Why don’t ants catch flu? Because they have tiny anti-bodies.
Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?
Because it had more cents.
Why is the obtuse triangle always so frustrated?
Because it’s never right.
Why is six afraid of seven?
Because seven eight nine.
Why was the equal sign so humble?
Because he wasn’t greater than or less than anyone else.
What do you call guys who love math?
Algebros.
How do you stay warm in any room?
Go to the corner—it’s always 90 degrees.
Why was the fraction nervous about marrying the decimal?
Because he would have to convert.
Are monsters good at math?
Not unless you count Dracula.
What do you think the big flower says to the small flower?
You are growing up fast bud!
Why does nobody talk to circles?
Because there’s no point.
THANKS FOR VISITING 🙂